When I entered into a Bank......

"I AM NOT HERE TO ROB THE BANK, ALL I WANT TO SAY IS THAT I DONT WANT ANY CREDIT CARD OR LOAN FROM YOUR BANK.......STOP CALLING ME........." --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I am a kind of person who can not say No to anyone...who can be easily convinced...especially by Marketing people...and I realized this when I visited a Branch of a Private bank...

I wanted to deposit some cash in my saving a/c. As I entered that branch, I found number of suspicious people ready to pounce on me.. I went to a beautiful lady sitting at the teller counter and told her about my intentions...I mean about Cash deposit...
Lady: "What is the Deposit Amount,Sir?"
Me: "Rs.8000"
Lady: "Sir, we have special Lucky Draw scheme for cash withdrawals above than or equal to Rs.10,000!! And I am sure that you wont miss this opportunity to get Lucky...etc etc..."
I felt so special after talking to that pretty lady...determined to change my haath ka lucky-r...I went to withdraw Rs. 2000 from ATM Machine and deposited in the same account again...just to be eligible for that scheme!!!
Then she asked me whether I wanted to invest in Mutual funds..I asked her what was her profile...of a teller or a sales-person...Seeing me as a vulnerable person...She just ignored my question...and started talking about advantages of Mutual Funds schemes...Growth story of Indian Economy...Fortune of Stock Markets...I realised that she is not just a Teller...but also a Story-Teller and Fortune-Teller!!! I ended up in 'investing' in various MF schemes in few minutes...as I didnt believe 'in-wasting' others' time...
As I was about to leave that counter, those marketing people launched an attack on me...and after talking to every one of them...I had applied for
-A savings A/c (though I had already one)
-A Current A/c (though I don't run any business)
-An International debit Card (though I have never ventured out of Maharashtra)
-2 Credit Cards (Though I dont have any credit standing even at local Kiranaa Store)
-Life Insurance Policies/Plans (though no one is concerned about risks faced by me in life and everyone is interested to be nominee of those policies)
-Each type of loans that bank offers (I don't have payment history...Forget about Repayment history!!)
-Registration for each Free facility provided by Bank...I asked them 100 times about hidden charges...Yet they managed to convince me...and I remained oblivious of their 'hidden' motives....

After spending 3 hrs there, Investment Relationship Manager (another lady) ordered a coffee for me...I poked my finger inside that cup and tried to search something...She asked me what was I doing...I said "Are there any hidden charges for coffee?"...She laughed so loudly...that caused coffee to spill on my shirt...

At the time of saying Good-bye to her....She smiled at me...I was about to ask her one question...but she told me quickly..."Sir, we dont charge any fees for smiling at customers!!"....I was a happy and relieved man while stepping out of branch...

Morale of the Story: Private Bank (Retail Banking) is no longer a place for Finance professionals to work at...Marketing professionals have great future here !!

Disclaimer: Though characters are fictional, this story is based on real life experiences at Bank...and I had thought of this while sitting idle in a branch for 3 hrs!!